I was actually sweating this last weekend. This doesn't happen all that often in north Germany. Some friends from Atlanta were visiting, and for them, this was weather as usual. They probably got tired of us saying, "I don't know what's going on! We NEVER sweat in Bremen!"
I am not one of those astrologers who can predict the weather. Maybe if I knew when a particular cloud was born, I could figure out whether it will rain on us or drift away. Astrology is definitely a study of beginnings. Amorphous things that blend into each other, like weather systems, evade our graphs and angles.
During the last couple of days, the moon has been traveling through Aries, conjoining Uranus and Jupiter, and that has made everything more exciting, not to mention occasionally unpredictable and nerve-wracking. Our Atlantean friends were catching a train to Frankfurt yesterday morning, and it broke down and blocked the tracks, so that the next one didn't arrive either. When they came back to our place, we said, "Amazing. The train always comes."
They're probably going to go home and tell everybody that northern Germany is a swelteringly hot place with unreliable trains.
The cardinal energy is still strong today. The moon is still in Aries, as are Jupiter and Uranus. Mercury, Juno, the sun and the south node are in Cancer, and Pluto and the north node are in Capricorn. All these planets in cardinal signs quicken my blood, make me eager to mark my place in the world. That's probably why I've returned to this blog this morning, promising myself an hour here before other commitments.
I've been thinking a lot about the energy we lead with, as we plow through the world. This is a very Aries-influenced train of thought. Aries is about the thrust towards the future. So I've been checking in with myself more often, thinking about my dominant emotion. What drives me at any particular moment? Sometimes it's joy, sometimes it's irritation, sometimes it's eagerness to experience something, sometimes it's curiosity, sometimes it's a sort of fatalism.
Those of you with strong Aries planets, or (like me) many planets in the 1st house, are probably feeling this increased self-awareness. It's stimulating. It's heady - naturally, since Aries rules the head.
What do we lead with? Doesn't it have a lot to do with where we're going?
Right now, I'm leading with excitement. Mixed in with the excitement is a sense of struggle, as I look for the words that will hold my meaning, as I reread what I've written, as I delete and reorder and rewrite. This struggle - the challenge of writing - holds the excitement, gives it something to do, keeps it with me.
And I feel good doing this. It feels right to me to be writing this blog, in this moment. I'm not feeling the resistance I felt last time, when the Mercury/Saturn square dogged my words.
We are all composed of a clamor of voices, needs, and drives, and they all compete to be the leading vibration. Pragmatism may come forward, with the authority of an earthy Saturn, and then suddenly be bounced by the emotional hungers of a watery moon. And then your Venus jumps in and says, "But hey, girls just want to have fun!" And for a moment, that's what you're doing. Until a cool airy Mercury moves in with a bemused overview.
And if two planets are in hard aspect to each other, one is more likely to jump in when it sees the other in the forefront. "No! Get that moon out of there! She'll just muck things up!" This is Saturn talking, when there's a hard moon/Saturn aspect in your chart. Saturn naturally wants to get in front and get everything back in order. But if she pushes the moon too harshly to the side, the moon will need a lot more comfort and reassurance when she finally manages to be the leading vibration again. And she will.
This is one reason it's good to make peace between your planets in conflict. Your vibration can be purely one thing - just the red anger of your fiery Mars, or the soft vulnerability of your watery moon - but it's often a hybrid. It can be the restrained wisdom of your airy Saturn coupled with the sensuality of your earthy Venus, so that you're having a great time but are also aware of your limits.
But that's different from holding your vibration back. Sometimes you have the energy right there, in the forefront, moving towards the future, vibrating like a house afire, making something happen. And some other part of you is saying, "No, no, that won't work," without putting anything new forward. Saturn can do this a lot.
You gotta love Saturn. You really have no choice about this.
And so when you catch Saturn doing this, you have to recognize that this negativity comes from somewhere. Suppose you've thought of something you really want to do, something incredibly interesting and time-consuming, and then suddenly you get a little depressed because you know you don't have time to do it. This is Saturn nixing that vibration. "Don't even think about it. You've got to finish XYZ first!"
So what do you do? You give Saturn what she wants, mainly Time.
You tell her, "It's there. It's beautiful, this idea. And I'll do it when I have time."
So there she is, right there in the leading vibration. There's Saturn. You can throw anything else in there with her. As long as you make sure there's Time.